Chapter 10
Ruby called me Mr. Adrian.
That hurt in a ridiculous way.
I did not correct her.
Names cannot be forced into affection.
One afternoon she found me sitting beneath the garden pergola with Lydia’s photograph.
She climbed onto the bench beside me.
“Blanket lady?”
I looked at the image.
Lydia holding the patchwork blanket hours after giving birth.
“Yes.”
Ruby pointed.
“Pretty.”
I smiled.
“She was.”
“Know me?”
My throat tightened.
“Yes.”
Ruby frowned.
“When?”
I looked toward Elena.
She stood several yards away, watching.
We had agreed on simple truth.
No dead baby story.
No adult betrayal.
Not yet.
I crouched in front of Ruby.
“She was there when you were born.”
Ruby thought.
“Mommy Elena too?”
“Yes.”
Different mothers.
Different parts.
She seemed satisfied.
Then she pointed at me.
“You there?”
My chest tightened.
“Yes.”
“Why no see me?”
Children ask the question adults build entire philosophies to avoid.
I answered the only way I could.
“Someone told me you were gone.”
She frowned.
“But here.”
“Yes.”
I smiled faintly.
“You’re very here.”
That made her laugh.
Good.
Later Elena sat beside me.
“She’ll ask again.”
“I know.”
“What will you tell her?”
“More truth when she can carry more truth.”
Elena looked relieved.
Then I said:
“I want you out of the maid quarters.”
Her body stiffened.
“No.”
I almost laughed.
Not fear.
Pride.
Good.
“I’m not ordering you into the main house.”
“Then what?”
“There’s an empty guest cottage near the east garden.”
“I can pay rent.”
“You don’t owe rent.”
Her eyes hardened.
“There. That.”
I understood.
She did not want gratitude turned into dependency.
After Claudia, neither did I.
“Fine.”
I nodded.
“You pay what the gardeners pay.”
She stared.
“That’s absurdly low.”
“It’s estate housing.”
She almost smiled.
Good.
Choice.
Not rescue.
Then she asked the question we had both avoided.
“What is Ruby to you now?”
I looked toward the child chasing a butterfly in yellow boots.
“My daughter.”
Elena’s face tightened.
I continued.
“And yours.”
She looked at me.
“No competition.”
That mattered.
May you like
Claudia had built her power by making every relationship hierarchical.
I refused to begin fatherhood by repeating the method.
