Chapter 16
Julian changed more than I expected.
Not completely.
I would not have trusted complete change anyway.
He remained arrogant.
Impatient.
Too fond of expensive watches.
But he stopped using fear as shorthand for authority.
I noticed during a capo meeting when a young soldier admitted a mistake.
Old Julian would have humiliated him publicly.
Instead, he asked:
“Can you fix it?”
The man said yes.
“Then fix it.”
Meeting continued.
Small.
Important.
Later I mentioned it.
Julian rolled his eyes.
“You keeping score?”
“Yes.”
He laughed.
Fair.
Then he grew quiet.
“I almost did it.”
“What?”
“Shamed him.”
I waited.
“I heard Mother’s voice.”
There it was.
Not magically healed.
Aware.
That is more believable.
Elliot eventually allowed Julian to visit the playroom.
First with me there.
Then briefly without me.
The first time Julian brought him a gift, Elliot looked suspicious.
“Mine?”
Julian swallowed.
“Yes.”
“No chain?”
Julian went pale.
“No.”
Elliot accepted the toy.
Children can forgive before adults know whether they should.
That does not mean adults get to demand it.
I made sure Julian understood.
He did.
“I don’t deserve how easy he makes this.”
“No.”
He looked at me.
“That was harsh.”
“Yes.”
Then I added:
“Use it well.”
May you like
He nodded.
That was enough.
